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general malaise
Jan. 8th, 2008 10:16 ami'm still recovering from this sickness. every day i wake up and realize that there is still more green to be spit up knocks me down another notch on the happiness pole. yesterday there was so much ache in my right lymph node that i had to give myself draining massages just to keep functional. and i've learned my lesson about fluids and their importance in recovery.
i've never been much of a drinker...of anything. especially water. and the water in our apartment--even filtered--is not appealing. we spent a good 15 minutes in the grocery store the other day, trying to find liquids that i would drink. milk is good, but expensive, and seems to sour quickly here. juices are full of corn syrup, the silent killer. i don't "do" orange juice (especially when i'm mucussy...it just causes the crap to thicken). obviously, soda is right out. we finally settled on a jug of 100% nothing-but-juice-and-proper-acids apple juice, and i've been sucking that down like air. 100% apple air.
poor boy was so happy when i came home last night, like a puppy. and i just couldn't match that. i don't feel like myself lately. just so unmotivated and uninspired. and the sickness amplifies it. gabe was in such a good mood last night that i had to rechannel it before it became annoying...and since he was doing his best to find something to cheer me up, i made him play video games. he's always looking for an excuse and i'm usually happy to watch, if the game is good.
i am getting better. but the recovery is much slower than i'd like. i just don't want to be in my body right now, and nothing seems right. gabe even asked me last night, "how's your cross stitch coming? i haven't seen you working on it," he of the snobbery towards handcrafts, underlining the fact that i've been far from normal lately and he'd even rather see me doing THAT than whatever i am now. "fine," i said, not wanting to talk about anything that concerns who i am or what i do.
i'm hoping this is just the sick and not me sinking into an emotional/creative hole....
i've never been much of a drinker...of anything. especially water. and the water in our apartment--even filtered--is not appealing. we spent a good 15 minutes in the grocery store the other day, trying to find liquids that i would drink. milk is good, but expensive, and seems to sour quickly here. juices are full of corn syrup, the silent killer. i don't "do" orange juice (especially when i'm mucussy...it just causes the crap to thicken). obviously, soda is right out. we finally settled on a jug of 100% nothing-but-juice-and-proper-acids apple juice, and i've been sucking that down like air. 100% apple air.
poor boy was so happy when i came home last night, like a puppy. and i just couldn't match that. i don't feel like myself lately. just so unmotivated and uninspired. and the sickness amplifies it. gabe was in such a good mood last night that i had to rechannel it before it became annoying...and since he was doing his best to find something to cheer me up, i made him play video games. he's always looking for an excuse and i'm usually happy to watch, if the game is good.
i am getting better. but the recovery is much slower than i'd like. i just don't want to be in my body right now, and nothing seems right. gabe even asked me last night, "how's your cross stitch coming? i haven't seen you working on it," he of the snobbery towards handcrafts, underlining the fact that i've been far from normal lately and he'd even rather see me doing THAT than whatever i am now. "fine," i said, not wanting to talk about anything that concerns who i am or what i do.
i'm hoping this is just the sick and not me sinking into an emotional/creative hole....
