westerner's guide to korea
Mar. 22nd, 2008 05:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
duchess_of_piepushing boundaries: pt. 4
it's not really pushing my boundaries, but![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
susiegrapefruit wants to read about...
whew. there's a lot to cover, even in generalities. well. this should be a good start, although it mostly just applies to seoul.
please note that this is more of a survival guide than anything...personal observations on traditions, holidays, culture quirks, and tourist traps are not included. those things are fun to discover for yourself.
also not included: what you need to know to work at a school there. that's a whole other guide in and of itself.
it's been slow at work, so thank you, laurie, for giving me something to take up the time.
LANGUAGE AND COMMUNICATION
first off, the koreans are very proud of their language, and they should be, it's a very pleasant sounding one. king sejong--a ruler from way way back--is credited with coming up with the hangul writing system, which is revered as being one of the most logically written linguistic systems in the world. learning to read korean is easier than any other asian language by far. and, while it is easier to learn to speak than the tonal languages, it is slightly harder than the clipped crispness of japanese.
even if you master the language, you may have to get used to repeating yourself. korea is not a huge tourist or immigration destination, so koreans are not as used to hearing their own language accented by a non-native tongue like we are. you may think you sound just right, but a korean ear is keen and the sounds are pretty precise.
if you are caucasian, though, you may find that people have a funny combination of reactions to you. most will try to avoid you because they're afraid of seeming foolish for not being fluent in english. a confident self-starter may walk right up to you and change his destination to follow you and speak with you so that he/she may practice english. (since private english lessons are expensive, if you have the time, offer to go to a bar or teashop with them. they will probably pick up the tab to show their hospitality and to thank you for the english time. don't be afraid to correct them, they do want to learn. but be nice about it. most koreans are embarrassed of their english skills.)
however. if you are black, you may be avoided altogether, although stared and pointed at. there are some heavy racial stigmas still in place there. people will be nice, but flustered by you. just be nice. help close the narrowing gap.
if you are asian, god help you if you don't know korean. they'll probably assume you are one of them and be confused when you can't speak properly.
in any case, it's good to pick up a couple of phrases, mostly, "how much?" and numbers, especially the words for "thousand" and "hundred" (due to the currency). the words for "i don't know" and "i don't understand" are similar sounding, and that's good to know. most people know a few english phrases they need for their business, and don't be afraid to use pantomime if you need to. (i once had to ask for shampoo for body lice--NOT FOR MYSELF it's a long story--and even though i didn't have the korean and they didn't speak english, some creative miming skills got the job done.)
NATIONALITY CONCERNS
if you speak english, it's assumed you are american. canadians, austrailans, kiwis and africaans, please don't take offense. also, if you are white, it is assumed that english is your first language and that you don't understand korean at all (which is funny if you do, because they like to talk about you on the subway).
there are huge army bases in both seoul and pusan, and some of our american troops do NOT conduct themselves well. their exploits are widely known, and sometimes koreans go through bouts of not liking americans very much. if you're getting the cold shoulder because someone doesn't like americans, it's not because of your western culture, it's because of the ego and assyness of a few men in uniform. pass yourself of as canadian, and you'll be fine. (if you're just traveling, you might want to invest in a canadian pin or patch for your pack. this is a good rule in much of asia.)
if you are blond, redhead and an even moderately pretty girl, you could be mistaken for russian. prostitution in korea is largely made up of koreans and russian/ukraine immigrants. if a man asks if you speak russian, he's trying to find out if you're a prostitute. to this, you should clearly answer NICELY, "i am not a prostitute." speaking from personal experience, sometimes you need to repeat this a couple of times, a little stronger. don't be offended at first, but if they persist, make sure you make it very clear that they are being offensive. most do not pursue.
the gay lifestyle is not really accepted as a good thing there. the two questions you are most asked are "how old are you" and "are you married." (this is just habit because of their language, since it's the first thing people need to know so that they may apply the proper title and politeness level when speaking to you.) if you are not married, most will press and ask, "why not?" marriage is a logical and appealing life step in their country. i've known homosexual individuals to get around this question by saying, "i haven't met the right person yet." it's just best to avoid the subject. and before you ask, no. korean men can be quite feminine and outed gays are few and far between, so there's no such thing as gaydar.
the center of seoul is just 50 miles south of the DMZ, so you're closer north korea than you'd think. south koreans are very thoughtful about re-unification. they think it's morally right, but scared about the impact it would have on their economy. they view the north country and government itself to be scary and crazy and sad, but they consider the north koreans to be their brothers and sisters, so any funpoking at the northern culture or people should be avoided and left to the natives.
GETTING AROUND
the subway system in seoul is one of the cheapest, cleanest, most efficient transport systems on earth. all the signs and announcements are in both korean and english, and there are maps everywhere. when i was there (2000-2002), a one-way ride was about 60 cents, all transfers included (and yes, you need to buy a ticket to get through the gates). the ticket dispensers are easy to use and have english...there's also a ticket booth where you can buy passes or get change. depending on time of day and which line you're using, it can be easy to get a seat, or you might have to turn around at the door and literally press yourself against the people to get in.
the buses are reliable, but learning a schedule can be tricky and prices vary depending on time and route. also, the traffic is crazy in seoul and the drivers are insane. if you ride the bus, you probably won't get a seat, so grab on to something and hold the fk on. it is not uncommon to see a newbie foreigner thrown to the floor.
taxis are okay during the day, and much cheaper than what we're used to. there are taxis on the street everywhere, and all you have to do is flag one down. just step at the curb and hold up your hand. sometimes, even occupied taxis will stop for you if you are going the same way as the other passengers. but be prepared to tell them in korean where you're going. they will drive up ask where to, and you must speak quickly. don't be offended if they drive off...they just aren't going that way. another one will.
getting a taxi at night as a foreigner is hard. everyone is drunk and needs a ride home, and if a cab driver sees you and doesn't want to put up with the hassle of communicating with you, they know another drunk skunk of their own tongue will be a block away. take the subway if you can or get a ride with a friend.
CRIME
crime rate is extremely low. you should feel no fear walking around at night. the biggest crime is stealthy pickpocketing, so if you're riding a crowded subway, keep crap out of your pockets and your baggage in front of you will all zippers shut and you should be fine.
it is said that you could leave a laptop on a bench somewhere by accident, and when you come back hours later, it will still be there. i don't know if that's as true as it once was, but it shouldn't be surprising if it happened to you.
so people are pretty honest...but bribery abounds. people bribe cops and inspectors all the time. you, as a foreigner, will not get away with it because officials will deny that bribery is commonplace. they will accuse you of being corrupt to save face.
CURRENCY
the won is easy enough to compare to the dollar. 1000 won equals ROUGHLY $1 US. W20,000 sounds like a lot, but it's only $20.
koreans usually pay cash for everything. they don't really have checks and only use their cards for heavy purchases. since the accepted brands change frequently in asia, it's best to just carry cash. nobody's going to mug you, but be wary of pickpockets in crowds.
W20,000 (picturing king sejong) is the largest bill they have, so if you're thinking of carrying a lot of money with you, better get a roomy wallet. other denominations include the W10,000, W5,000 and W1000 bils, and the W500 and W100 coins (worth about 50 and 10 cents respectively). there are W50 and W10 coins, but you'll rarely use them as almost nothing is taxed (well, tax is built in) and almost everything is priced to the thousand won.
rates for most things are slightly-to-moderately cheaper than those in the states.
FOOD
it's really easy to find western food if you really can't stomach korean. all the fast food chains and places like TGIFridays can be found. however. it's in your best interest to start trying an array of korean foods, for several reasons.
1) it's cheaper.
at a western restaurant, you will pay higher prices than you do here, but you can eat a good korean meal for about 2-3 dollars, sometimes less.
2)it's healthier.
there's a lot of seafood, vegetables, garlic, and fermented/chili-augmented things in their food, all of which are very very good for you.
3) once you learn to like it--and for some, it is a learning process--you will never be hard-up for possibilities. there are food stands everywhere, and private business restaurants outnumber all other business.
some food to get familiar with:
--kimchi (the national "dish"): this is really just the name for the cabbage that is fermented with chili, and garlic, but it also covers a wide array of pickled/fermented vegetables that may be served with your meal. it's traditional to see several small bowls of these (mostly kimchi and pickled radishes) on the table for everyone to share (you eat these out of communal bowls). every establishment and home takes pride in their own handmade kimchi, so one's criticism on this dish should always be kept to one's self.
--bibimpap: "pap" or "bop"(as it sounds) means rice. this is a dish that most westerners start with, and nearly all like. it's a bowl of rice, topped with different banchan. banchan are literally "bits and pieces"...so, slivered and marinated carrots and cucumbers, string mushrooms, maybe some meat, and other veggies on top. you dollop some chili paste on it and stir it up and eat it. most places serve it cold, and some give you an option for hot--if hot, they may put a raw egg on top. do not be alarmed. it's served in a cauldron bowl that cooks the egg as you stir it all up. and then some of the rice in the bottom cooks all crispy at the bottom of the bowl and that's a tasty end to the meal.
--chige: this means soup, and there are several kinds. most of them are spicy and contain clams in the shell. (note: many seafood dishes come looking like the animal they are. shrimp sometimes still have the leggs, heads, and shells; fish retain their heads, and squid--so tasty!--look like squid.)
--bulgogi: this is becoming more popular in the west, and if you haven't tried it yet, you should. it's a sweetly marinated sliced beef. good on sammiches.
--kalbi: this is a meal for more than one person. it's beef, usually brought to you raw, and you cook it on the frying table you sit at. you wrap it up with veggies in leaves, dip it in a sauce and stuff it in your mouth parts. mmmm. (there is a loose variation of this called takkalbi. tak means chicken.)
--pork cutlet: as it sounds. popular, cultural import from japan. rarely found in chicken variety, but if you're ever going to seoul, i could draw you a map to a good place.
--mandu: dumplings. delicious, delicious dumplings. mostly made with pork. (you can also ask for mool mandu. mool means water, so these are boiled.)
--dak (sounds like "duck"): ricecake. sometimes you'll get a dish that has some tube-shaped white masses in it with a look and consistency of a string-cheese stick. this is dak. it's just made from rice and, if accompanied by the right sauce, is delicious. you can find it at roadside stands as dak poki...covered in chili sauce and often served with a hard-boiled egg.
--samgetang: this is a whole small chicken, beheadded, befooted, plucked and gutted, stuffed with rice and ginseng, and served in a broth. the meat is soft and it's extremely tasty...most koreans can eat it all in one sitting. it's a traditional dish that is served on three days during the summer (the dates of which move around with the lunar calendar, so it's best to ask a korean), but you can find it year-round. just look for large places that have rows of chickens roasting on spits (unmarinated) in the window. these places will be full to bursting during the special days, so if you want a good cultural experience, choose one of those days. if you want to avoid rush and crowds, stay away.
--soju: like sake. very potent. can also be served flavored. i recommend cherry and lemon. drink with caution...it will sneak up on you. sometimes you don't even feel it until you stand up, and then your ass is on the ground. i was usually messed up after three cups (sake-size), but five or six will do in even the heartiest drinkers.
--pickles and corn: just so you know, the equivalent of kimchi for italian food is sweet pickle slices. if you go out for italian food (this includes pizza), you will receive a little cup of pickle slices. just an odd heads up. oh. also. they put corn on pizza unless you ask for no corn. i don't know why.
--bakery items: not their strong point. korea is the place to go if you're on a diet...all the traditional treats are good for you and once you've had korean cheese cake (depending on the kind, it just might be a regular cake, cheese-flavored), you'll be off the baked items for good.
--bondegi: if you're out on the street and someone with an ice-cream-like cart is selling something brown and steamy and smelling for all the world of DEATH, stay away. these are silk worm cocoons, and they are the worst thing you will ever smell in your life.
--sweet potatoes and chestnuts: some vendors will sell these on the street during winter and there's nothing more comforting than a warm yam when it's cold. just look for someone with a big 20-gallon drum suspended on its side that seems to have a fire going inside. they're making up goodness in there. if you're out and about and your hands are cold, the sweet potatoes make good pocket warmers for quite a while. then you also have a treat for later.
--dog: i would like to use this space to clean up the misconception. remember that korea used to be poor and large animals were expensive to buy and keep up. dog was once a national dish, but it should be noted that a certain kind of dog was bred as livestock, they weren't just picked up willy nilly off the street. they don't really serve it in wide circulation today because they are sensitive to the way the world regards them and they recognize it as a black mark. it isn't illegal for restaurants to serve it, but it is illegal to prepare it in the traditional way--that is, beating the dog to death to release the adrenaline into the blood (this gives the meat a good flavor). any resturant that serves it will tell you that it is prepared legally...but, like i said, there's a lot of bribery and rule-breaking that happens, so even though 19 our of 20 are telling the truth, there's the other one that is trying to pass off the tastier meat as a secret recipe. if you want to try the dish and want to make sure the animal is killed humanely, you have to watch the slaughter (not truly an option)...which is likely to turn you off to it entirely anyway.
note: vegetarians have a tough time in korea. although there are tons more veggies in their meals than is popular in the west, almost every dish has some kind of meat, even if it's egg or shellfish. hell. even kimchi has shrimp paste as an ingredient.
PERSONAL SPACE
in cities like seoul, this doesn't really exist. it's best to take a deep breath and shed your protective stance on your western arms-length bubble of security, because it will be breached several times a day. shake it off. on the busier streets, you will be shoulder to shoulder, knocking elbows, and ajimas (old women) will lay the palms of their hands on you to push you aside so they can get through.
if you make a friend of the same sex, they can be touchy people. girls generally link arms or hold hands and guys hang on each other like couples do here. but opposite sex contact is a bit more serious and even couples rarely hold hands.
special note: there is a gay culture in korea, but it is hugely hushed up and readily denied. (celebrities are forced to publicly apologize for their behavior if they are caught!!) they understand that there are huge differences between our culture and theirs though, so if two male foreigners are seen holding hands, they will assume you are gay and frown upon it. (two foreign girls though, totally okay.)
also, get ready to be stared at. until you are introduced or get to know a korean, you are not a person, you are an object, and they will blatantly stare, sometimes going so far as to turn toward you and give you the up-and-down. they do it to each other, but you'll get it more because, even though westerners are becoming more common, you're still a fresh and odd thing to see. try to ignore this, even though it will be difficult, it's not meant to be an affront, like it is here. they're just looking. if you catch their eye it will be in your nature to smile or glare, and in theirs to give no reaction whatsoever...not even to look away. this is not malevolence, it's just the same as if you were looking at a post--why smile back at a post? it's a cultural thing that neither side really ever gets over.
TOILETS
many places have public restrooms with a combination of western-style and floor toilets...but some will only have floor-style. don't be scared. floor toilets seem daunting at first, but are much more simple than western toilets. just squat over them and flush with your foot when you're done. (it's actually better for your body to crap this way.) the stall walls go all the way to the floor, so don't worry about being seen.
because the stalls go to the floor, some more inventive etiquette must be used. when entering a restroom, knock lightly (one-two) on the stall door. if someone knocks back, it's occupied. turn about, if someone knocks on your door, simply knock back.
BATHROOMS
sometimes you'll just have one room that is tiled completely, with a drain in the floor. it looks like a regular bathroom--toilet,sink,etc--and a showerhead. close the door. the entire room is your shower.
OUT IN THE COUNTRY
sometimes there is a huge difference between the westernization in the city versus the 100-years-ago feel in the country. some places might not have electricity or turn it off at a certain time. most all places have floor toilets, some in a separated outhouse. public transport is by once-a-day bus and there is nothing but locally-prepared korean food. as a westerner, you are VERY unusual if seen outside the city. people will stare at you every second you are in sight. most people are very nice and smile more than their city counterparts, but the elderly might not speak back to you if you try to talk to them, in any language. basically, the country is for driving through from one city to another. living in a small town or in a rural area is for die-hards only.
CLIMATE AND SEASONS
summer is very hot and very humid. july and august are good months to get aquainted with your shower...i averaged 4 cold ones a day. it gets REALLY sticky. good things to keep with you: a folding fan to keep cool, a handkerchief to wipe sweat, and an umbrella to provide shade...believe me, it makes a huge difference.
winter is cold enough to need a winter coat, but it's better than the midwest. it will snow, but it rarely accumulates for more than a day or two and then it's gone. beware this time, koreans are not accustomed to driving in snow, and they're crazy drivers in the best of times.
spring will bring the "yellow sand." basically, wind blows over the deserts in china and picks up a lot of it and dumps it on korea and japan. you'll have a day or two in the spring where you can't see very far,the air's that thick with it. you'll get black boogers and grit in your teeth...it's best to invest in a cold mask. these are like ER masks that people wear when they have a cold to prevent spread of disease.
fall is nice, but rains often. umbrellas are sold everywhere for about a dollar or two. and if you forget yours, the business you are frequenting usually has a few extras. their name and address is on the label. just remember to return it later (within the day or the next).
most days are really smoggy. remember, 15 million people live in seoul alone. and most of them have cars.
TOPOGRAPY AND GEOGRAPHY
the country is small (about the size of indiana), but it still takes many hours to travel from seoul in the north to pusan on the south coast. there's just a huge population and the traffic is awful. it's like los angeles x10. DO NOT TRAVEL DURING NEW YEARS OR CHUSOK (their thanksgiving-equivalent holiday). just...take my word for it. the whole country is on the road or in the air. not even an exaggeration. if you're just going for a visit, plan around these times. if you're living there, remember to stock up on food for these days, because almost everything closes down.
seoul is surrounded by mountains and the han river cuts through the center. otherwise it's pretty flat and even and easy to navigate, but the traffic is overly hostile to bikers. many motobikes often use the sidewalk. something else to be aware of when walking. also, the city is huge...it can take two hours to get from one end to the other by subway (that includes all the outlying areas).
there is one major island in the south, chejudo. it's kind of comprable to japan's okinawa, or america's hawaii, in that it's a bit more tropical and has a distinctly different island culture. korean newlyweds often go there on their honeymoon.
PLACES TO KNOW IN SEOUL
--kangnam: the main business district
--insa-dong: a street of traditional arts and wares
--apkujong: a rich and trendy neighborhood, like the beverlly hills, korean style, lots of awesome shops and restaurants
--dongdaemun: a good shopping district
--itaewon: where all the americans hang out. korean parents usually forbid their kids to go there, and with good reason. there's lots of G.I.s there that act like assholes. if you want to be around a lot of rowdy whities and bitter english teachers, it's the place for you. also home to the only mosques and most of the gay bars.
--incheon: on the west coast, good for fresh seafood
--coex mall: the subway goes right there and, besides your regular mega-mall, has the biggest cinema house you've ever seen
--nakseoungdae: a quiet and run-down area at the foot of the mountains that is a sweet/cheap place to look for an apartment to rent.
--yeoksamdong: a quieter business district. fun on new year's.
MANNERS AND GESTURES
take your shoes off when coming into a house or temple. there will generally be a place to put them, either a cubby or just a dropped entrance area. some specialty restaurants will have floor seating and will ask that you take your shoes off before entering that area.
blowing your nose is very rude. hawking and spitting on the ground (outside) is okay though. you'll hear people do this a lot.
it's perfectly acceptable to openly hail a waiter in a restaurant.
the hand signal we use for "come here" (the crooked finger) is slighty offensive there. asian cultures generally have a signal like this: hold your arm out, palm down, and use all fingers to sweep in. in our culture, it might look like someone is trying to shoo you away. not so here.
koreans bow, but it's not as precise a thing as it is in japan. they are perfectly happy to shake your hand, but they also do short bows of politeness. don't worry about reciprocating right off the bat. after a while, you'll just start doing it naturally, because it is in our nature to mimic. and once you come back to the west, you won't be able to stop.
another polite gesture involves the exchange of money. this involves putting your free hand, palm up, on the underside of the elbow of the giving/taking hand (coupled with a short bow). this stems back to a culture of pulling back sleeves for politeness and has just never been dropped. if you're unfamiliar with this gesture, you're not required to do it as a foreigner, and indeed, you'll look really dorky if it's not second nature. but you'll get plenty of chances to observe it.
a similar gesture is observed with glasses. it's polite to pour for others, but not for yourself. so if a party member at your table is pouring you a drink (not the waitress), lift your cup up with one hand and hold the bottom of your glass with the palm-up fingertips of the other.
also, it's polite to give and receive most items (even paper or business cards) with both hands.
ques. cues don't really exist in hard form in korea. if you're lining up for something and there's a throng, don't be surprised to find yourself budged. lining up for buses,subways, and elevators is pretty non-existent. just join the knot, be patient and go with the flow.
old people are to be respected. it's pretty much the custom to treat any elderly like your own parents/grandparents (figuratively, that's how they're viewed). you should always give them your seat on the bus or subway, even if they don't acknowledge or thank you. sometimes they'll smile and wave you back down into the seat, wishing to show congeniality to you as a visitor. but the native youth don't get that kind of treatment. (it's fun to watch the a young upstart get chewed out if he/she doesn't offer up their seat to grandma!!!) if an elder needs help, it's kind to offer, especially if you're the only one around, but otherwise best to leave that to another korean.
OTHER CONCERNS
recreational drugs aren't commonly found and are not tolerated at all. don't bring them, don't do them. the punishment can range from deportation to heavy jail time, even for pot. carry prescriptions for medications and any over-the counters in their boxes. (while we're on this subject, best not to transport drugs--even pot--anywhere in asia. punishment in some parts is strict. we're talking death. and i'm not kidding. just don't fk around with this.)
caveat to females of asian descent: it is considered rude for a young lady to smoke in public. if you do this, you may get chewed out by an old-generation individual. just be informed so you know where they're coming from if you start getting an earful out of the blue.
korea is a social and professional drinking community. they work hard and stay late at their jobs and if the boss wants to go drinking, you go drinking. it is not uncommon to see a business man in the morning, in suit and tie, passed out with his head on his briefcase under a bus stop bench or on the sidewalk somewhere. most people just leave them be. you should too.
bring deodorant. they don't sell it there. they'll tell you it's because korean's don't sweat, but anyone who's been on a crowded subway in july can smell through this lie.
most clothing shops don't have fitting rooms, so you must buy by the eye. and if you're heavy or tall, good luck. bring your own clothes.
healthcare is top notch and cheap. they don't turn you away for lack of insurance.
if you're going to live there and need a phone, you'll have to find a store that will sell you a phone and a number. generally, they'll have a small selection of previously owned phones for your to choose from and you'll have to pre-pay every month. this is because foreigners have been known to rack up huge bills and then leave the country, so now it's pre-pay all the way. take a korean who knows english with you to negotiate, and make sure they switch the phone for you so the menus read in english.
korean buddhists have a different set of rules than that of other asian buddhists. touring temple grounds is totally okay and you are welcome to do so whenever they are open. but actually entering the temple is a different story, and it might be best to go with a native. i've heard that some temples have seperate entrances for foreigners. don't be offended by this, they're just trying to protect their rituals and worship spaces from those who weren't brought up in their form of the religion.
it's not really pushing my boundaries, but
susiegrapefruit wants to read about...whew. there's a lot to cover, even in generalities. well. this should be a good start, although it mostly just applies to seoul.
please note that this is more of a survival guide than anything...personal observations on traditions, holidays, culture quirks, and tourist traps are not included. those things are fun to discover for yourself.
also not included: what you need to know to work at a school there. that's a whole other guide in and of itself.
it's been slow at work, so thank you, laurie, for giving me something to take up the time.
LANGUAGE AND COMMUNICATION
first off, the koreans are very proud of their language, and they should be, it's a very pleasant sounding one. king sejong--a ruler from way way back--is credited with coming up with the hangul writing system, which is revered as being one of the most logically written linguistic systems in the world. learning to read korean is easier than any other asian language by far. and, while it is easier to learn to speak than the tonal languages, it is slightly harder than the clipped crispness of japanese.
even if you master the language, you may have to get used to repeating yourself. korea is not a huge tourist or immigration destination, so koreans are not as used to hearing their own language accented by a non-native tongue like we are. you may think you sound just right, but a korean ear is keen and the sounds are pretty precise.
if you are caucasian, though, you may find that people have a funny combination of reactions to you. most will try to avoid you because they're afraid of seeming foolish for not being fluent in english. a confident self-starter may walk right up to you and change his destination to follow you and speak with you so that he/she may practice english. (since private english lessons are expensive, if you have the time, offer to go to a bar or teashop with them. they will probably pick up the tab to show their hospitality and to thank you for the english time. don't be afraid to correct them, they do want to learn. but be nice about it. most koreans are embarrassed of their english skills.)
however. if you are black, you may be avoided altogether, although stared and pointed at. there are some heavy racial stigmas still in place there. people will be nice, but flustered by you. just be nice. help close the narrowing gap.
if you are asian, god help you if you don't know korean. they'll probably assume you are one of them and be confused when you can't speak properly.
in any case, it's good to pick up a couple of phrases, mostly, "how much?" and numbers, especially the words for "thousand" and "hundred" (due to the currency). the words for "i don't know" and "i don't understand" are similar sounding, and that's good to know. most people know a few english phrases they need for their business, and don't be afraid to use pantomime if you need to. (i once had to ask for shampoo for body lice--NOT FOR MYSELF it's a long story--and even though i didn't have the korean and they didn't speak english, some creative miming skills got the job done.)
NATIONALITY CONCERNS
if you speak english, it's assumed you are american. canadians, austrailans, kiwis and africaans, please don't take offense. also, if you are white, it is assumed that english is your first language and that you don't understand korean at all (which is funny if you do, because they like to talk about you on the subway).
there are huge army bases in both seoul and pusan, and some of our american troops do NOT conduct themselves well. their exploits are widely known, and sometimes koreans go through bouts of not liking americans very much. if you're getting the cold shoulder because someone doesn't like americans, it's not because of your western culture, it's because of the ego and assyness of a few men in uniform. pass yourself of as canadian, and you'll be fine. (if you're just traveling, you might want to invest in a canadian pin or patch for your pack. this is a good rule in much of asia.)
if you are blond, redhead and an even moderately pretty girl, you could be mistaken for russian. prostitution in korea is largely made up of koreans and russian/ukraine immigrants. if a man asks if you speak russian, he's trying to find out if you're a prostitute. to this, you should clearly answer NICELY, "i am not a prostitute." speaking from personal experience, sometimes you need to repeat this a couple of times, a little stronger. don't be offended at first, but if they persist, make sure you make it very clear that they are being offensive. most do not pursue.
the gay lifestyle is not really accepted as a good thing there. the two questions you are most asked are "how old are you" and "are you married." (this is just habit because of their language, since it's the first thing people need to know so that they may apply the proper title and politeness level when speaking to you.) if you are not married, most will press and ask, "why not?" marriage is a logical and appealing life step in their country. i've known homosexual individuals to get around this question by saying, "i haven't met the right person yet." it's just best to avoid the subject. and before you ask, no. korean men can be quite feminine and outed gays are few and far between, so there's no such thing as gaydar.
the center of seoul is just 50 miles south of the DMZ, so you're closer north korea than you'd think. south koreans are very thoughtful about re-unification. they think it's morally right, but scared about the impact it would have on their economy. they view the north country and government itself to be scary and crazy and sad, but they consider the north koreans to be their brothers and sisters, so any funpoking at the northern culture or people should be avoided and left to the natives.
GETTING AROUND
the subway system in seoul is one of the cheapest, cleanest, most efficient transport systems on earth. all the signs and announcements are in both korean and english, and there are maps everywhere. when i was there (2000-2002), a one-way ride was about 60 cents, all transfers included (and yes, you need to buy a ticket to get through the gates). the ticket dispensers are easy to use and have english...there's also a ticket booth where you can buy passes or get change. depending on time of day and which line you're using, it can be easy to get a seat, or you might have to turn around at the door and literally press yourself against the people to get in.
the buses are reliable, but learning a schedule can be tricky and prices vary depending on time and route. also, the traffic is crazy in seoul and the drivers are insane. if you ride the bus, you probably won't get a seat, so grab on to something and hold the fk on. it is not uncommon to see a newbie foreigner thrown to the floor.
taxis are okay during the day, and much cheaper than what we're used to. there are taxis on the street everywhere, and all you have to do is flag one down. just step at the curb and hold up your hand. sometimes, even occupied taxis will stop for you if you are going the same way as the other passengers. but be prepared to tell them in korean where you're going. they will drive up ask where to, and you must speak quickly. don't be offended if they drive off...they just aren't going that way. another one will.
getting a taxi at night as a foreigner is hard. everyone is drunk and needs a ride home, and if a cab driver sees you and doesn't want to put up with the hassle of communicating with you, they know another drunk skunk of their own tongue will be a block away. take the subway if you can or get a ride with a friend.
CRIME
crime rate is extremely low. you should feel no fear walking around at night. the biggest crime is stealthy pickpocketing, so if you're riding a crowded subway, keep crap out of your pockets and your baggage in front of you will all zippers shut and you should be fine.
it is said that you could leave a laptop on a bench somewhere by accident, and when you come back hours later, it will still be there. i don't know if that's as true as it once was, but it shouldn't be surprising if it happened to you.
so people are pretty honest...but bribery abounds. people bribe cops and inspectors all the time. you, as a foreigner, will not get away with it because officials will deny that bribery is commonplace. they will accuse you of being corrupt to save face.
CURRENCY
the won is easy enough to compare to the dollar. 1000 won equals ROUGHLY $1 US. W20,000 sounds like a lot, but it's only $20.
koreans usually pay cash for everything. they don't really have checks and only use their cards for heavy purchases. since the accepted brands change frequently in asia, it's best to just carry cash. nobody's going to mug you, but be wary of pickpockets in crowds.
W20,000 (picturing king sejong) is the largest bill they have, so if you're thinking of carrying a lot of money with you, better get a roomy wallet. other denominations include the W10,000, W5,000 and W1000 bils, and the W500 and W100 coins (worth about 50 and 10 cents respectively). there are W50 and W10 coins, but you'll rarely use them as almost nothing is taxed (well, tax is built in) and almost everything is priced to the thousand won.
rates for most things are slightly-to-moderately cheaper than those in the states.
FOOD
it's really easy to find western food if you really can't stomach korean. all the fast food chains and places like TGIFridays can be found. however. it's in your best interest to start trying an array of korean foods, for several reasons.
1) it's cheaper.
at a western restaurant, you will pay higher prices than you do here, but you can eat a good korean meal for about 2-3 dollars, sometimes less.
2)it's healthier.
there's a lot of seafood, vegetables, garlic, and fermented/chili-augmented things in their food, all of which are very very good for you.
3) once you learn to like it--and for some, it is a learning process--you will never be hard-up for possibilities. there are food stands everywhere, and private business restaurants outnumber all other business.
some food to get familiar with:
--kimchi (the national "dish"): this is really just the name for the cabbage that is fermented with chili, and garlic, but it also covers a wide array of pickled/fermented vegetables that may be served with your meal. it's traditional to see several small bowls of these (mostly kimchi and pickled radishes) on the table for everyone to share (you eat these out of communal bowls). every establishment and home takes pride in their own handmade kimchi, so one's criticism on this dish should always be kept to one's self.
--bibimpap: "pap" or "bop"(as it sounds) means rice. this is a dish that most westerners start with, and nearly all like. it's a bowl of rice, topped with different banchan. banchan are literally "bits and pieces"...so, slivered and marinated carrots and cucumbers, string mushrooms, maybe some meat, and other veggies on top. you dollop some chili paste on it and stir it up and eat it. most places serve it cold, and some give you an option for hot--if hot, they may put a raw egg on top. do not be alarmed. it's served in a cauldron bowl that cooks the egg as you stir it all up. and then some of the rice in the bottom cooks all crispy at the bottom of the bowl and that's a tasty end to the meal.
--chige: this means soup, and there are several kinds. most of them are spicy and contain clams in the shell. (note: many seafood dishes come looking like the animal they are. shrimp sometimes still have the leggs, heads, and shells; fish retain their heads, and squid--so tasty!--look like squid.)
--bulgogi: this is becoming more popular in the west, and if you haven't tried it yet, you should. it's a sweetly marinated sliced beef. good on sammiches.
--kalbi: this is a meal for more than one person. it's beef, usually brought to you raw, and you cook it on the frying table you sit at. you wrap it up with veggies in leaves, dip it in a sauce and stuff it in your mouth parts. mmmm. (there is a loose variation of this called takkalbi. tak means chicken.)
--pork cutlet: as it sounds. popular, cultural import from japan. rarely found in chicken variety, but if you're ever going to seoul, i could draw you a map to a good place.
--mandu: dumplings. delicious, delicious dumplings. mostly made with pork. (you can also ask for mool mandu. mool means water, so these are boiled.)
--dak (sounds like "duck"): ricecake. sometimes you'll get a dish that has some tube-shaped white masses in it with a look and consistency of a string-cheese stick. this is dak. it's just made from rice and, if accompanied by the right sauce, is delicious. you can find it at roadside stands as dak poki...covered in chili sauce and often served with a hard-boiled egg.
--samgetang: this is a whole small chicken, beheadded, befooted, plucked and gutted, stuffed with rice and ginseng, and served in a broth. the meat is soft and it's extremely tasty...most koreans can eat it all in one sitting. it's a traditional dish that is served on three days during the summer (the dates of which move around with the lunar calendar, so it's best to ask a korean), but you can find it year-round. just look for large places that have rows of chickens roasting on spits (unmarinated) in the window. these places will be full to bursting during the special days, so if you want a good cultural experience, choose one of those days. if you want to avoid rush and crowds, stay away.
--soju: like sake. very potent. can also be served flavored. i recommend cherry and lemon. drink with caution...it will sneak up on you. sometimes you don't even feel it until you stand up, and then your ass is on the ground. i was usually messed up after three cups (sake-size), but five or six will do in even the heartiest drinkers.
--pickles and corn: just so you know, the equivalent of kimchi for italian food is sweet pickle slices. if you go out for italian food (this includes pizza), you will receive a little cup of pickle slices. just an odd heads up. oh. also. they put corn on pizza unless you ask for no corn. i don't know why.
--bakery items: not their strong point. korea is the place to go if you're on a diet...all the traditional treats are good for you and once you've had korean cheese cake (depending on the kind, it just might be a regular cake, cheese-flavored), you'll be off the baked items for good.
--bondegi: if you're out on the street and someone with an ice-cream-like cart is selling something brown and steamy and smelling for all the world of DEATH, stay away. these are silk worm cocoons, and they are the worst thing you will ever smell in your life.
--sweet potatoes and chestnuts: some vendors will sell these on the street during winter and there's nothing more comforting than a warm yam when it's cold. just look for someone with a big 20-gallon drum suspended on its side that seems to have a fire going inside. they're making up goodness in there. if you're out and about and your hands are cold, the sweet potatoes make good pocket warmers for quite a while. then you also have a treat for later.
--dog: i would like to use this space to clean up the misconception. remember that korea used to be poor and large animals were expensive to buy and keep up. dog was once a national dish, but it should be noted that a certain kind of dog was bred as livestock, they weren't just picked up willy nilly off the street. they don't really serve it in wide circulation today because they are sensitive to the way the world regards them and they recognize it as a black mark. it isn't illegal for restaurants to serve it, but it is illegal to prepare it in the traditional way--that is, beating the dog to death to release the adrenaline into the blood (this gives the meat a good flavor). any resturant that serves it will tell you that it is prepared legally...but, like i said, there's a lot of bribery and rule-breaking that happens, so even though 19 our of 20 are telling the truth, there's the other one that is trying to pass off the tastier meat as a secret recipe. if you want to try the dish and want to make sure the animal is killed humanely, you have to watch the slaughter (not truly an option)...which is likely to turn you off to it entirely anyway.
note: vegetarians have a tough time in korea. although there are tons more veggies in their meals than is popular in the west, almost every dish has some kind of meat, even if it's egg or shellfish. hell. even kimchi has shrimp paste as an ingredient.
PERSONAL SPACE
in cities like seoul, this doesn't really exist. it's best to take a deep breath and shed your protective stance on your western arms-length bubble of security, because it will be breached several times a day. shake it off. on the busier streets, you will be shoulder to shoulder, knocking elbows, and ajimas (old women) will lay the palms of their hands on you to push you aside so they can get through.
if you make a friend of the same sex, they can be touchy people. girls generally link arms or hold hands and guys hang on each other like couples do here. but opposite sex contact is a bit more serious and even couples rarely hold hands.
special note: there is a gay culture in korea, but it is hugely hushed up and readily denied. (celebrities are forced to publicly apologize for their behavior if they are caught!!) they understand that there are huge differences between our culture and theirs though, so if two male foreigners are seen holding hands, they will assume you are gay and frown upon it. (two foreign girls though, totally okay.)
also, get ready to be stared at. until you are introduced or get to know a korean, you are not a person, you are an object, and they will blatantly stare, sometimes going so far as to turn toward you and give you the up-and-down. they do it to each other, but you'll get it more because, even though westerners are becoming more common, you're still a fresh and odd thing to see. try to ignore this, even though it will be difficult, it's not meant to be an affront, like it is here. they're just looking. if you catch their eye it will be in your nature to smile or glare, and in theirs to give no reaction whatsoever...not even to look away. this is not malevolence, it's just the same as if you were looking at a post--why smile back at a post? it's a cultural thing that neither side really ever gets over.
TOILETS
many places have public restrooms with a combination of western-style and floor toilets...but some will only have floor-style. don't be scared. floor toilets seem daunting at first, but are much more simple than western toilets. just squat over them and flush with your foot when you're done. (it's actually better for your body to crap this way.) the stall walls go all the way to the floor, so don't worry about being seen.
because the stalls go to the floor, some more inventive etiquette must be used. when entering a restroom, knock lightly (one-two) on the stall door. if someone knocks back, it's occupied. turn about, if someone knocks on your door, simply knock back.
BATHROOMS
sometimes you'll just have one room that is tiled completely, with a drain in the floor. it looks like a regular bathroom--toilet,sink,etc--and a showerhead. close the door. the entire room is your shower.
OUT IN THE COUNTRY
sometimes there is a huge difference between the westernization in the city versus the 100-years-ago feel in the country. some places might not have electricity or turn it off at a certain time. most all places have floor toilets, some in a separated outhouse. public transport is by once-a-day bus and there is nothing but locally-prepared korean food. as a westerner, you are VERY unusual if seen outside the city. people will stare at you every second you are in sight. most people are very nice and smile more than their city counterparts, but the elderly might not speak back to you if you try to talk to them, in any language. basically, the country is for driving through from one city to another. living in a small town or in a rural area is for die-hards only.
CLIMATE AND SEASONS
summer is very hot and very humid. july and august are good months to get aquainted with your shower...i averaged 4 cold ones a day. it gets REALLY sticky. good things to keep with you: a folding fan to keep cool, a handkerchief to wipe sweat, and an umbrella to provide shade...believe me, it makes a huge difference.
winter is cold enough to need a winter coat, but it's better than the midwest. it will snow, but it rarely accumulates for more than a day or two and then it's gone. beware this time, koreans are not accustomed to driving in snow, and they're crazy drivers in the best of times.
spring will bring the "yellow sand." basically, wind blows over the deserts in china and picks up a lot of it and dumps it on korea and japan. you'll have a day or two in the spring where you can't see very far,the air's that thick with it. you'll get black boogers and grit in your teeth...it's best to invest in a cold mask. these are like ER masks that people wear when they have a cold to prevent spread of disease.
fall is nice, but rains often. umbrellas are sold everywhere for about a dollar or two. and if you forget yours, the business you are frequenting usually has a few extras. their name and address is on the label. just remember to return it later (within the day or the next).
most days are really smoggy. remember, 15 million people live in seoul alone. and most of them have cars.
TOPOGRAPY AND GEOGRAPHY
the country is small (about the size of indiana), but it still takes many hours to travel from seoul in the north to pusan on the south coast. there's just a huge population and the traffic is awful. it's like los angeles x10. DO NOT TRAVEL DURING NEW YEARS OR CHUSOK (their thanksgiving-equivalent holiday). just...take my word for it. the whole country is on the road or in the air. not even an exaggeration. if you're just going for a visit, plan around these times. if you're living there, remember to stock up on food for these days, because almost everything closes down.
seoul is surrounded by mountains and the han river cuts through the center. otherwise it's pretty flat and even and easy to navigate, but the traffic is overly hostile to bikers. many motobikes often use the sidewalk. something else to be aware of when walking. also, the city is huge...it can take two hours to get from one end to the other by subway (that includes all the outlying areas).
there is one major island in the south, chejudo. it's kind of comprable to japan's okinawa, or america's hawaii, in that it's a bit more tropical and has a distinctly different island culture. korean newlyweds often go there on their honeymoon.
PLACES TO KNOW IN SEOUL
--kangnam: the main business district
--insa-dong: a street of traditional arts and wares
--apkujong: a rich and trendy neighborhood, like the beverlly hills, korean style, lots of awesome shops and restaurants
--dongdaemun: a good shopping district
--itaewon: where all the americans hang out. korean parents usually forbid their kids to go there, and with good reason. there's lots of G.I.s there that act like assholes. if you want to be around a lot of rowdy whities and bitter english teachers, it's the place for you. also home to the only mosques and most of the gay bars.
--incheon: on the west coast, good for fresh seafood
--coex mall: the subway goes right there and, besides your regular mega-mall, has the biggest cinema house you've ever seen
--nakseoungdae: a quiet and run-down area at the foot of the mountains that is a sweet/cheap place to look for an apartment to rent.
--yeoksamdong: a quieter business district. fun on new year's.
MANNERS AND GESTURES
take your shoes off when coming into a house or temple. there will generally be a place to put them, either a cubby or just a dropped entrance area. some specialty restaurants will have floor seating and will ask that you take your shoes off before entering that area.
blowing your nose is very rude. hawking and spitting on the ground (outside) is okay though. you'll hear people do this a lot.
it's perfectly acceptable to openly hail a waiter in a restaurant.
the hand signal we use for "come here" (the crooked finger) is slighty offensive there. asian cultures generally have a signal like this: hold your arm out, palm down, and use all fingers to sweep in. in our culture, it might look like someone is trying to shoo you away. not so here.
koreans bow, but it's not as precise a thing as it is in japan. they are perfectly happy to shake your hand, but they also do short bows of politeness. don't worry about reciprocating right off the bat. after a while, you'll just start doing it naturally, because it is in our nature to mimic. and once you come back to the west, you won't be able to stop.
another polite gesture involves the exchange of money. this involves putting your free hand, palm up, on the underside of the elbow of the giving/taking hand (coupled with a short bow). this stems back to a culture of pulling back sleeves for politeness and has just never been dropped. if you're unfamiliar with this gesture, you're not required to do it as a foreigner, and indeed, you'll look really dorky if it's not second nature. but you'll get plenty of chances to observe it.
a similar gesture is observed with glasses. it's polite to pour for others, but not for yourself. so if a party member at your table is pouring you a drink (not the waitress), lift your cup up with one hand and hold the bottom of your glass with the palm-up fingertips of the other.
also, it's polite to give and receive most items (even paper or business cards) with both hands.
ques. cues don't really exist in hard form in korea. if you're lining up for something and there's a throng, don't be surprised to find yourself budged. lining up for buses,subways, and elevators is pretty non-existent. just join the knot, be patient and go with the flow.
old people are to be respected. it's pretty much the custom to treat any elderly like your own parents/grandparents (figuratively, that's how they're viewed). you should always give them your seat on the bus or subway, even if they don't acknowledge or thank you. sometimes they'll smile and wave you back down into the seat, wishing to show congeniality to you as a visitor. but the native youth don't get that kind of treatment. (it's fun to watch the a young upstart get chewed out if he/she doesn't offer up their seat to grandma!!!) if an elder needs help, it's kind to offer, especially if you're the only one around, but otherwise best to leave that to another korean.
OTHER CONCERNS
recreational drugs aren't commonly found and are not tolerated at all. don't bring them, don't do them. the punishment can range from deportation to heavy jail time, even for pot. carry prescriptions for medications and any over-the counters in their boxes. (while we're on this subject, best not to transport drugs--even pot--anywhere in asia. punishment in some parts is strict. we're talking death. and i'm not kidding. just don't fk around with this.)
caveat to females of asian descent: it is considered rude for a young lady to smoke in public. if you do this, you may get chewed out by an old-generation individual. just be informed so you know where they're coming from if you start getting an earful out of the blue.
korea is a social and professional drinking community. they work hard and stay late at their jobs and if the boss wants to go drinking, you go drinking. it is not uncommon to see a business man in the morning, in suit and tie, passed out with his head on his briefcase under a bus stop bench or on the sidewalk somewhere. most people just leave them be. you should too.
bring deodorant. they don't sell it there. they'll tell you it's because korean's don't sweat, but anyone who's been on a crowded subway in july can smell through this lie.
most clothing shops don't have fitting rooms, so you must buy by the eye. and if you're heavy or tall, good luck. bring your own clothes.
healthcare is top notch and cheap. they don't turn you away for lack of insurance.
if you're going to live there and need a phone, you'll have to find a store that will sell you a phone and a number. generally, they'll have a small selection of previously owned phones for your to choose from and you'll have to pre-pay every month. this is because foreigners have been known to rack up huge bills and then leave the country, so now it's pre-pay all the way. take a korean who knows english with you to negotiate, and make sure they switch the phone for you so the menus read in english.
korean buddhists have a different set of rules than that of other asian buddhists. touring temple grounds is totally okay and you are welcome to do so whenever they are open. but actually entering the temple is a different story, and it might be best to go with a native. i've heard that some temples have seperate entrances for foreigners. don't be offended by this, they're just trying to protect their rituals and worship spaces from those who weren't brought up in their form of the religion.
