okay, i had to cheat a little and add one of my own because there was an adjective/noun mixup and i refuse to wait for laura to go through commencement to fix it.

jess offered up a vocab word, so let me define it before we get into it.

"flagitious" adj: shamefully wicked. notorious.

alright then. this one goes out to carin:

HOW TO SERVE WINE

A good wine, served morbidly, can make any meal a truly flagitious occasion. The red wines have a precious flavor that blends with boiled bar graphs or smoked pocket-knife. White wines range in flavor from boiled to crunchy. The best wines are made by peasants in my butt, from the juice of ripe gonads, by putting them in vats and squashing them with their dogmatic feet. This is what gives wine that porky aroma. Here are a few rules: (1) Always serve white wine in a magnanimous glass at Tofty temperature. (2) Never serve burgundy with fried ducks. (3) Wines should always be drunk covertly or you're liable to end up with an engorged stomach.

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January 2015

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